Confessions :The Heart Part 1

I have gone through the emotions and I still am going through them,

All I know is that nothing feels the same,

I am not okay, nor have I been okay for some time,

And I can not keep my silence, I am not a mime.

I am hurting and I am sure that you are hurting as well,

The confusion of everything, I know that it must be hell,

And the uncertanity of it all,

Must feel like you are on the edge of a cliff about to fall.

I have been where you have been,

Experienced it all, even though at the beginning it life felt so mean,

I think that pain is worth going through,

Because no one will ever understand, maybe a very few,

Know what it feels like to love someone, let alone not be sure if that person is the right one for us,

So I want you to understand that I understand,

More than you will ever know.

I know that you will say that Kundai,

What I am experiencing is something new,

I am being confronted with my own mortality and I do not know what I want,

I feel as though time has moved,

And that I am not ready to be there,

And to that I say, I understand,

I understand, the confusion and loss of identity,

I understand the feeling of not being able to trust my own thoughts,

The uncertain feeling of being unable to connect the dots.

I know how it feels,

And at the same time I know that I can't help you,

Because this something that you have to go through,

And it will be tough,

It will be rough,

But it still has to happen.

I promised that I will give you space,

But if I can be honest I have no idea what that means,

I miss you and you miss me and that's okay but at the same time,

I have always given you space and I wonder if this maybe a sign that certain things were never meant to be,

I'm sorry,

I'm just thinking out loud again,

I just worry that this space wont do any good,

I just worry that it will not lead to an improvement in your mood,

or mine,

And I confess that for that reason I am not fine...

To be continued...........

Recent Posts