Aug 10, 20222 min read

On the edge

I was once a man on redemptions road,

I thought that I was ready to take the long highway to becoming a better man,

I thought that I was ready to finally be at peace with my past,

But it seems as though my past is not at peace with me,

It beckons me to my previous misdeeds,

Promising me those sweet little treats,

Some fun here and some fun there,

Beckoning me to indulge in my vices because there is solace in the devil that you know ,

That striving to live in the unknown.

I find myself day by day hunting for those things that give me a moment of pleasure,

Rather than deal with what really aches me,

I saw myself day dreaming of the next time that I touched that bottle,

Whilst driving fast on full throttle,

Because only then do I feel the joy of living in the moment,

The joy of knowing that this is my present,

And the fear of knowing that any mistake would lead to an accident,

Because only then would I truly be free.

I recently started a new chapter in my life and like all new born babies i entered this world crying that woe is me,

The broken one ,the failure,

the disappointment,

And I must say, that it hurt in the beginning,

And it still hurts even as I write,

But I see a glimmer of hope in the darkness,

Or maybe its the clarity that comes with soberness,

But I do feel as though i am moving closer to the end of my story,

Good or bad,

I don't know,

But the thought of reaching the end gives me something to look forward to,

Making my bad days lesser and few,

For I am wanted and the ending my life is due.

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